Here is a step-by-step guide to how Gerrymandering works.


STEP 1:

Exhausted lawmaker thinks it might be nice to never have to campaign or listen to voters in district ever again


STEP 2:

Candidates meet with their constituents and decide which ones they’d like to hear from

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STEP 3:

Democrats are lured into blue districts with promise of functional school systems

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STEP 4:

Cartographer has only clandestine meeting of life


STEP 5:

Child’s drawing of a seahorse traced onto a map of North Carolina


STEP 6:

Terrified lawmakers cower in corner of lab and shout “It’s alive!” after bringing freakish composite district into being

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STEP 7:

Lawmaker in gerrymandered district undergoes brief existential crisis upon realizing nothing he says or does has any consequences

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STEP 8:

Voter gives up


STEP 9:

Unstoppable political dynasty established in 300-mile-long, 10-foot-wide strip of Arizona

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