WASHINGTON—Q, the pseudonymous individual who for the last several months has released classified information about high-ranking government officials and the deep state, reportedly tendered his resignation from the U.S. Department of Agriculture Tuesday after failing to properly file an expense report. “I want to apologize to the American taxpayers for abusing my power as a public servant in the USDA, as well as everyone depending on me to supply high-level classified information from the Trump administration as the leader of QAnon,” said Ray Benjamin, 59, who stepped down from his post as a commodity grader in the Agricultural Marketing Service division of the USDA after 26 years with the agency and nearly a year posting on 4chan and 8chan as Q. “I deeply regret failing to document my $15.35 meal, as well as several other business expenses, including a reimbursement for parking, but ultimately I must own up to my mistakes. Unfortunately, with my security clearance revoked and my access to top-secret government intelligence cut off, it means that I will no longer be capable of posting updates about The Storm, offering informed predictions of Hillary Clinton’s imminent arrest, or unmasking the establishment liberals involved in a massive international human-trafficking ring. I am profoundly sorry to both the Department of Agriculture and to my QAnon supporters. I let you all down.” Reached for additional comment, Benjamin admitted that he was privately relieved that he was no longer under the obligation to run QAnon and could spend more time relaxing with his wife, gardening, and watching University of Virginia football.

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