The highly controversial recent confirmation of Brett Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court marks an especially divisive moment in the history of America’s judicial branch. The Onion takes a look at the most pivotal moments in the Supreme Court’s 229-year history.


1789:

The Judiciary Act establishes the Supreme Court with a mandate to eventually fix all the things that the Constitution totally screwed up.

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1832:

President Andrew Jackson decides to defy the Supreme Court’s ruling in Worcester v. Georgia after realizing that those Native American pussies don’t even have an army.

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1869:

First Supreme Court group photo ruined by Chief Justice Salmon P. Chase blinking.

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1901:

After months of striking, the Fuller court negotiates an eight-hour workday for all justices in the U.S.

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1919:

Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. argues that one cannot falsely yell “Fire!” in a crowded theater even if the play is total garbage.

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1926:

For 19 hours, the Supreme Court is apolitical for the only time in its history.


1938:

Congress regrets permitting lifetime appointments after 187-year-old original Justice James Iredell continues to refuse calls to step down.

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1954:

Brown v. Board of Education eliminates racial segregation on paper.


1995:

Court gets hopes up that they’ll be able to meet O.J. Simpson, but his case never goes that far.

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2018:

Brett Kavanaugh becomes 56th justice whose confirmation disgraces the institution of America’s highest judicial body.

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