WASHINGTON—Following a series of incidents that left food and used paper products scattered throughout the West Wing, White House staff were reminded Friday to place lids firmly on all trash cans after President Trump’s senior advisor, Steve Bannon, got into the garbage again. “It’s imperative that everyone securely fasten their receptacles so as not to attract Mr. Bannon by the smell of rotting fruit or moldy bread,” said White House chief usher Angella Reid, noting that Bannon was crafty and could work his way into almost any type of bin if there was even the smallest gap. “Just last week, he tracked old coffee grounds through the Roosevelt Room and then left a pile of chicken bones under the Resolute desk. This problem is getting out of hand, so if everyone steps up, it’ll mean a lot less sweeping for all of us.” Reid added that any staffers who encountered Bannon while he was feeding could attempt to shoo him away by loudly clapping their hands, but should not directly approach him, as he could be carrying some sort of disease.
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